Your Goals Don’t Define You. This Does!!

Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.

tony robbins

Like I have mentioned before, most of my life till my early 30s, I was a ‘goalless’ person. I had no particular ambitions or any desire to reach anywhere in life.

But all that changed when I lost my job which was dear to me. I was so dependent on the job that, I was too emotional when I was let go. As I opened myself to ideas beyond what I thought myself, I realized that the world is much more than you think of it.

I met amazing people, I connected with like minded people, I made good friends, I helped people who needed help, I took help from people who could help me. I had set eyes on my goals. And a pattern started emerging out of all the chaos around.

I had grown up in a modest household in India where my basic needs were met. My dad worked in Bahrain and we were never made to feel lack of anything basic. In fact, I’d say, my life was comfortable due to this.

But this comfort spoils you to some extent. Unless you are self motivated, it hard to take steps. One of my teacher’s used to repeat, ‘genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.’ These words ring constantly these days in my brain.

Yes, having goals is good. But you know what defines you?

Your goals do not define you!

Your CHOICES do!

Take a peak back at your life. Rewind the tape. See where you were 5 or 10 years back. And look at you now.

What is the difference between the 10 year back ‘you’ and the now ‘you’?

We often blame our circumstances. We blame our education system. We blame our teachers. We blame our parents. We blame everyone around us.

I understand while you were a child, your parents would take your decisions. But this should not be the reason for your life today!

You are the sum of all the choices you make in your life.

Deepak machado

Your current situation is nothing but your choice.

  • You made the decision to be in the place you are.
  • You made the choice to work for that company.
  • You made the choice to watch Netflix (and feel bad about it later…I have done this).
  • You made the choice to join the gym.
  • You made the choice to help your neighbor.
  • You made the choice to come to Dubai.
  • You made the choice to live where you do.
  • You made the choice to eat that heavy burger.
  • You made the choice to spend on that Brunch.
  • You made the choice of the night out.
  • You made the choice to scroll indefinitely on FB app.
  • You made the choice to meditate.
  • You made the choice to write.
  • You made the choice to start your YouTube channel.
  • You made the choice to do an MBA or any degree that you have done.
  • You made the choice to buy that car.
  • You made the choice to marry that man/woman.
  • You made the choice to go for a walk.
  • You made the choice to do a course.
  • You made the choice to read the book.
  • You made the choice to spend time with your kids.

Everything is a choice you make; for better or for worse! You are the sum of all the choices you have made.

You may have heard about the 86400$ story. If not, here it is: You are given 86400$ a day to spend. You have to spend it yourself. You can not lend it. You can not store it. If you don’t use them, they expire at the end of the day.

What would you do?

Yes, You’d spend it wisely right!? These 86400$ represent the number of seconds in a day. Spend them wisely.

We take numerous decisions or choices every day. Life gives you opportunities every minute of the day. It depends on you, how you spend them.

Here are few ways in which I try to make good choices that improves qualify of my life:

#Have Definite Goals

If you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time.

zig zigler
sticky notes on board
Photo by Polina Zimmerman on Pexels.com

Why don’t you do something right now?

Grab a pen and notebook. Write all your high level goals that you want to achieve. These may be outrageous goals. It depends on your imagination.

  • Making 10 million Dollars
  • Having a beach front mansion
  • Retire by age 40
  • Have multiple sources of income
  • Having 5 kids
  • Retire in an exotic location
  • Get a better job with 5 times salary

There is nothing wrong with goals.

Once you have written your goals, work backwards to think on how you will achieve those. For each of your goals write clearly the steps you feel are necessary to achieve. If it too much for you to achieve them, take professional help. Speak to people.

If you work towards your goals consistently and are persistent, you will achieve them.


#Have Faith

Without faith a man can do nothing; with it all things are possible.

Sir William Osler
close up view of text on wood at home
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There is nothing great in this world than having faith in yourself. Many of us are too self critical. We doubt in our own abilities.

I was same few years back. I was too shy to show my talents. I would do for others, but when it came to myself, I would always reason that I was not good enough. I have lost so many opportunities due to this.

When you have decided to make a choice, have faith in your own judgment. There is a power in the faith. It keeps you at your goals. It keeps you persistent. If you do not believe in your own choices or talents, there is no one who would believe it. If you do feel strongly that you have made a right choice, keep at it.


#Have Abundance Mindset

See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it, it always works, it works every time with every person.

bob proctor
battle black blur board game
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

There is enough for everyone in this world. The choices you make should come from abundance mindset and not from a poor mindset.

I have real life examples of people who have made right choices and landed up in their dream career, dream businesses, dream houses and so on. This was possible just because of their abundance mindset. If these people mentioned that there was not enough money to be made in a particular business, they would have started in the first place.

This is not from where they started. They started with a mindset that there is enough resources for everyone in this world. And it is up to each one of us on how we approach this.


#Learn from the Past

Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real.

 Cormac McCarthy
woman writing on a notebook beside teacup and tablet computer
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Have you made the same mistake twice? Who is to be held responsible for the mistake second time?

I once invested in a stock that I was not too fully convinced. And you know the result. I lost the money. This was not first time, I did that. But this was not the first time I had invested in a similar company. Greed had the better side of me. A poor choice indeed.

I have also seen one of friends make poor business decisions few times, ultimately losing all the capital. And this was not the first time!

Learning from your own past mistakes will definitely help you make better choices in the future. This lesson has helped me personally avoid some bad choices, bad relationships, bad friendships.


#Learn from Others

A lifelong learner is a lifelong winner.

Matshona Dhliwayo
two women looking and pointing at macbook laptop
Photo by mentatdgt on Pexels.com

Learning from others is by far the most underrated way to make good choices. You don’t have to make mistakes and learn from them. You can look at other people’s mistakes and learn pretty good lessons.

These can be from investing, personal development or whatever field. There are loads of people who already have your type of goals. Explore the internet to find the people who you look up to.

If you would like to be a great investor, you could follow Warren Buffet or Bill Ackman or Ray Dalio. These are legendary investors. Follow them on what they are doing.

If you would like to be at your personal best, follow people like Tony Robbins, Jay Shetty.

Learning from those who have already done it is a sure shot way to success.


#Read More Books

A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies . . . The man who never reads lives only one.

george rr martin
white ceramic teacup with saucer near two books above gray floral textile
Photo by Thought Catalog on Pexels.com

Books have these amazing way to transform your mindset. There is so much of wealth of knowledge, I use them daily to infuse new ideas, new thoughts in my mind.

This has given me a peculiar thinking ability which I lacked few year back. On a daily basis, I either read books, listen to audio books, listen to podcast etc in areas where I am interested to grow. I invest heavily in my personal transformation and personal growth.

Slowly but surely, I know these will have positive effect on my life.

Again a choice.

I need not say more. Read More Books. You will make better choices.


#Connect with People You’d Like To Be

Invisible threads are the strongest ties.

Friedrich Nietzsche 
photo of people doing handshakes
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This is on the top of my list! If you have a goal, I am sure there are people who have already achieve it. Why don’t you connect with these people?

So, that’s what I did!

  • I wanted to invest better, so I joined an investment education group;
  • I wanted to learn from entrepreneurs, I joined an entrepreneur group;
  • I wanted to develop my presentation skills, I joined Toastmasters group.

The choice is yours. The opportunities are plenty. Take a step.


Your choices decide who you become. You may be earning a high income. But you made a poor choice of investing in cryptocurrencies! You may be a high flying businessman. But you made a poor choice of investing in a new business that you do not understand.

Think of all the areas of your life where you feel you are lagging behind. And as the question,:

WHY?

At the base level, it’s your choice.

Making a good choice will result in a good life. Your choices define who you really become. Your choices decide on the quality of your life.

Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.

John C. Maxwell

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